Burnt Cookies

Miraculous Memories Of A United States Marine Mom

MommaMac


Burnt Cookies By MommaMac

 

Fear That Overwhelms~Faith That Consumes

A beautiful, blustery cold end of November day, was shaping up to be productive in that Christmas Cookie making kind of way. Our family tradition of giving a package of sweet treats to all of our neighbors the first week in December was off to a great start. The peanut butter kiss cookies were in the oven and I had just mixed up a batch of my son’s favorite chocolate mint cookies. I smelt the dough and so many memories flooded me. The tears began to fall as they did a lot these days, as I juggled my emotions from fear to faith, knowing my son was fighting in Iraq, somewhere over there in that horrid war zone, so I could freely do with my day what I chose.

Just Get It Together~Bake It Off

I can’t help to think how much freedom these United States Marines give up to service our liberties. Making cookies and fighting for your life, wow, the two can’t even begin to be compared. I missed him so much and felt the hope rising in me for him to come back to us in one piece. At times I just don’t know how it is humanly possible to reconcile the fear that overwhelms me with the faith that consumes me. I willed myself out of my train of thought, knowing that it would take over me, and I had cookies to make. I always would speak to myself like I knew my Marine son would. So I said to myself: “Get it together McCarthy” and it worked and I continued my baking, feeling like a disciplined Marine Mom.

Strange Changes~ Weird Sanity

The house was smelling so good. I knew that I needed not to be a taster of the goodies, because I could never stop with one taste! I needed something to keep my mind occupied though, so I turned on the television set. No, not the news. Can’t watch the news. It just unnerves me to watch anything about the war. Oh, here we go. I turned on an old program, without any shooting or conflict, “Little House On The Prairie”, that should do it. I was not sure if I was the only Marine Mom who could not handle the sound of gun shots. Maybe I was just weird. I could not watch any more of my television shows that I used to watch because just the sound of gunshots pierced right through my mom’s heart to my soul. Just one of those strange changes that happened to me when my son went off to war. Well I guess it is not a time to question my sanity, or I will never get these cookies finished.

Mistaken Identity~Marine Mom Down

Three cookie batches down, the chocolate mint cookies looked and smelled so good. I started to hope for the time when my son would be home and I could happily watch him down three or four of them at a time. They definitely would last longer this year. A knock at the door shook me out of my day dreaming. That is odd, I thought, it is a crazy time of day for visitors and besides living about three quarters of a mile up a dirt road, we were kind of buried in the mountains and no one really came up here, unless they were invited, or were neighbors, none of which I was expecting. So I cautiously went to the door and opened it and there stood a United States Marine in full uniform. All the color drained from my face, I felt my knees go out from under me. No, not my son, not my son, I cried out inside of me. We knew as military families that no news was good news and we also knew that if our soldier was killed in action that they would send someone to our home to notify us.

Exchanged Viewpoints~A New Realism

It seemed like forever went by and then I heard the Marine ask me if I was okay, and I vaguely remember him saying that they were stopping by the neighborhoods today to tell us about “Toys For Tots”, the United States Marine program where you could give toys for needy children. He asked me again if I was okay, by then I had gotten up and felt the blood come back to my head. I explained to him that I had a son fighting in Iraq and I had not heard from him the last six weeks, he then very much understood my reaction. He was so sorry, he felt so bad about the misunderstanding of what had just happened. He was not here to tell me my son had died, he was here to tell me about Toys for Tots.

A Validated Marine Mom~A New Perspective

He did not leave right away, he stayed and we talked a little while about my son.  I realized that he was staying just to make sure I was okay, I was still shaking a bit. I love that about the United States Marines, they truly do honor, respect and care for their “Marine Moms”, even if they are not related to them, it is a military family kind of thing. It was obvious to me that he too learned a lot from experiencing my reaction to thinking my son had died. We talked a bit about how they have their point of view about their life as United States Marines, but this experience today had added a realism for him about what Military Moms have to “grow through” during war times. I was very new at being a military mom, so I really appreciated that he embraced my point of view, it really validated my thoughts that being a Marine Mom was way more than a title. I could see a new awakening of understanding in the eyes of this United States Marine, who took the time out of his job to take care of the heart, of the mom of one of His United States Marine brothers, who he had not even met.

A Sweet Treat~Burnt Cookies

The sweet thought that we were a big family helped to settle my anxiety more and even though that misunderstanding was a very emotional thing to go through, we both had grown because of it. It was a very productive day. Oh no, I forgot the batch of cookies in the oven. Yikes, I am thinking these are definitely not going to be a sweet treat. Burnt cookies, a memory I will not soon forget. Oh, and yes my son made it back from that deployment in one piece, thank God, and the picture above is us, right after he got off the bus on the tarmac where all the families where waiting for their loved ones. Waiting on the tarmac to say goodbye, to say hello, that is another story for another day. Signing off, MommaMac.

MommaMac

I was a United States Marine Mom for twelve years. My son was medically retired a few years ago. I have a book in me, it is going to be called: A Marine Mom’s Miraculous Memories. So, you all are going to be my “test subjects”. How about that!? Let me know what you think. Yes, continue writing this book or NO, hang up your pen! LOL! Have a great day and don’t forget to thank a military family today in a tangible way, they so need the encouragement. God bless you MUCH, KimberlyMac


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